Why I Am A Better Mom With Baby Number 2
As many books as I read, as much as I tried to prepare for my first little girl….I can fully admit she tossed my world upside down, yet simultaneously brought so much joy into my life it’s unbelievable. Two years later, I feel confident as a mom and we decided to bring baby number two into the world. I thought I knew it all this time around…Yet once again this little bundle of joy came and my world got tossed upside down the other way! Motherhood definitely gets a good laugh in at my expense daily!
All of the moms I know are beautiful inside and out. They are pulled together, their kids area adorable and it seems to me that they are all Martha Stewart reincarnations…then there is me. All I know is that I am willing to share my imperfect journey through motherhood as I want to make sure moms who feel the same way I do know they are not alone!
I am just a mom trying to do my best this time around with baby number 2. Here are some things I have learned personally along the way.
1. I stopped comparing my parenting, my housework, my cooking and my journey through motherhood with other women. Quite frankly, I am too tired to care about what how other people are parenting. I just want to hug and love and cherish my own growing family.
2. I have been forced to resort to formula feeding due to conditions out of this control freaks control. And let me tell you the notion that formula makes babies sleep better is WRONG in this house at least. My baby has stomach issues most nights from the formula (yes I have spent hundreds of dollars trying different kinds) and she is feeding every 2.5 hours still on formula! So, looking back when I breastfed my first, I always was temped with the notion that if I just gave formula I might get more sleep…but nope. Not happening for us.
3. I want to have more fun in life! The first time around I felt isolated and trapped sometimes caring for one child. It seemed like so much work to get out of the house. This time around, I put some extra diapers in the car, grab a bottle and I am out the door. Do I forget things? Sure…but there is always a store near by. I plan fun events, I do moms nights out, we do date night, we travel. All I know is that I want great memories with my girls and sometimes it takes a little extra effort and planning but it is always worth it!
4. I have taken control of my own happiness. I remember the first time around I would yearn for the moment my husband would walk through the door to hand off the baby. Then I would feel guilty that he worked all day, yet that I still needed a break from our child. It was very frustrating. I felt like for 14 months ‘me time’ was forgotten and I held resentment, if I am honest about it.
This time around, I do impromptu playdates that are easy, I start dinner at 3pm, I do the girls bath time at 5 and put my husband’s dinner on warm in the oven. It’s not up to anyone else but me to create my own happiness! I know my kiddos are watching my every move and I want happiness to radiate into their lives.
5. If I listened to every mom who thought they were an expert I would spend all day going crazy with worry and stress. It makes me cringe sitting at mommy events listening to moms talk about their recommendations, as every child’s needs are SO DIFFERENT! This time around, I go to the family experts on ihelpmoms.com. Every family environment is different. Every child is different, Parenting techniques and philosophies are different. Experts see a WIDE variety of families and have a more objective perspective to help moms to be happy and healthy. (Yes talking to your trusted friends can be enlightening and helpful, but I personally have found much more reliable and objective insight with our expert family focused professionals especially through my difficult journey through breastfeeding and my amazing experience with child birth)
Great resources like our ihelpmoms.com nutrition consultants, mental health therapists, doulas, grocery delivery, meal delivery, life coaches, chiropractors, acupuncturists, spas, fitness trainers and more have all played a role in helping me to be healthy and happy with baby number 2. It’s FREE for moms to search on www.ihelpmoms.com so make sure you connect with our amazing ihelpmoms.com providers!