Moms Friends or Foes?
Today I was sitting watching our new baby play and I wondered is she just a great baby or have I grown up? I have never loved being a mom more than I do this third time around.
I realized looking over at one of my long time mom friends today, that yes, I am a totally different mom than when we met 4 years ago at mommy and me.
I no longer worry about the little things.
If my kid is sad or doesn’t want to share or is tired, I am no longer embarrassed, as I realize they are kids and kids do these things.
I leave a diaper and wipes in my car and head out the door now. No room for over flowing diaper bags among backpacks, lunch boxes, sweaters, and swim bags. Oh and princess dresses of course!
From 4:30 am to 11 pm at night I am working, working out, taking care of kids, cooking, doing laundry and driving all over. The days of long morning playdates at Starbucks and baby outings are bygones. Cherished yes, but bygones. Now I drive through Starbucks and throw donuts at my kids in the back while I slug down a Venti coffee to stay awake!
Bottle versus breast, cloth versus Honest Company versus Huggies, preschool or no school, it no longer matters, natural teething solutions or medicine for teething. The only thing that really matters is now I am confident in making the best decisions for my baby without judgement or comparison.
Mom friends come and go as our kids go from stage to stage in life and that is okay. First baby it can feel isolating and awkward. Nowadays I realize mom friends can come into our lives for a season and a reason. It happens. But for those friends that get you- Really get you, through tough times and good times- make quality time a priority. The friends that come over after you have a baby and see you in your big baggy pants, hair in a bun and circles under your eyes. Those mom friends- Make time for them.
Looking down at my baby’s face today I realized that I am definitely a different woman than I was three kids ago. I like this woman that has gone through hard times, growth, frustration, joy and now empowerment.
Motherhood makes us stronger. It allows us to tap into the depths of who we are for patience, for leadership, for emotion and most of all for love.
I see clearly now that my priority is my family. I see that I want to raise my kids around friends that love us and that we love. I have mom friends that we see at the park and then don’t see for a long time. I have professional friends. I have mom friends from my first baby’s mom friends that have boys so I don’t see them as much anymore now that the girls are princess crazed. I also have friends that I haven’t see for years that kids have helped us to rekindle. Life is moving fast and there just isn’t time for baby mama drama. Sometimes when you actually get a breather in motherhood, you just want those friends that you can text the funny stuff that happens that day even though you haven’t gotten to spend time together in a while. Those friends that feel like no time has gone by once you do get a chance for a girls night…the best feeling ever!
Most of all be the kind of friend you want to have and just be kind to every mom that comes across your path. Whether moms show it or not we are all on a roller coaster of a journey called motherhood. No time for foes!
More love. Less judgement. It Makes Motherhood Easier.